


to you

by whiternights



Category: NU'EST
Genre: 404 minhyun not found, Alternate Universe, Gen, Letters, M/M, Unspecified Relationship, but hopefully it gets better, it’s just dongho being sad, nothing happens
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-07
Updated: 2020-07-14
Packaged: 2021-03-04 21:54:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 5,731
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25123486
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/whiternights/pseuds/whiternights
Summary: dongho tries to move on by writing letters he can never send
Relationships: Hwang Minhyun & Kang Dongho | Baekho, Hwang Minhyun/Kang Dongho | Baekho
Comments: 7
Kudos: 16





	1. Chapter 1

** dear minhyun, **

> it’s so strange, how easily people’s relationships can change. not too long ago, i was spending a good chunk of my days talking to you. now, it’s radio silence. it almost makes me wonder if any of those times ever happened at all.
> 
> the past couple of days, i’ve been going through my memories of the conversations we shared, trying to figure out what lead us to this point, but i just can’t seem to find an answer. i know i can be pretty thoughtless and immature at times, and i’m sure i worded a lot of things very badly on many occasions. for that, i’m sincerely sorry. i don't want to be the kind of person who disregards your feelings and forces my presence upon you when it's clearly not wanted, but if it's not too much, can you at least tell me what i did so wrong this time that you decided to shut me out all of a sudden?
> 
> it’s actually impressive, how you managed to cut me off so completely and so abruptly. i have to admit i didn’t see that coming. you really left me with no way to reach you without resorting to pretty desperate methods. but you’d probably dislike me even more if i did anything like that, so this is as far as i’d go.
> 
> do i sound reproachful? i’m really not, i swear. right now, i just feel empty— like i woke up with a gaping hole in my chest that i can do nothing about.
> 
> remember when i told you that i’m really thankful to have you around? i meant every word of it. with you, i always felt comfortable and secure. when you said you also felt the same, it made me so happy. after all, it’s not easy to meet someone like you, who made me feel completely understood and appreciated. it almost seemed too good to be true.
> 
> and i guess it was.
> 
> am i really that easy to leave behind, minhyun? do you now think of me and get a bitter taste in your mouth? does the thought of me upset you? annoy you? anger you? or do you just not think of me at all? am i the only one who jumps at every phone notification, desperately hoping for it to be you?  am i the only one who feels sad and helpless over this situation?  am i the only one who wants things to work out?
> 
> i wonder when it changed for you. maybe i did something terrible without even realizing it. or maybe you were slowly growing tired of me and i was just too dense to notice. or is it that you've just been trying to bear with me from the very beginning? would i ever know? would any of these questions ever be answered?
> 
> honestly, i wish i could fix everything. i wish i knew what about me upset you, and i wish i could undo that and go back to how we were when things were still good between us. i wish i could at least talk to you properly— get some kind of closure, if there’s really nothing else i can say or do to make things okay. but no matter how hard i wish for it, i can’t do any of those things now because you’ve shut me out so thoroughly.
> 
> ah. i sound so pathetic it’s almost funny.
> 
> i still have so many things i want to ask you, but at the same time, i don’t know what else i can say that haven’t already been said. in the end, it all boils down to one word: why?
> 
> tell me, minhyun. have you ever written letters you can never send? it’s a strange feeling. i’m writing all my feelings down like this, but for what? for whom? it’s not like you’d ever see this. but then again, what else can i do? how else am i supposed to deal with all these unanswered questions and all these unresolved feelings you’ve left in your wake?
> 
> i’m terrible at ending things, so i’ll just close this letter by saying that i hope you’re okay. or at least i hope you’re doing much better than i am right now. i would say i'm hoping to hear back from you soon, but, well, you would never read this anyway. so i guess just... see you around. i wish.

** — dongho **

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i tweet things sometimes: [ @whiternights](https://twitter.com/whiternights)


	2. Chapter 2

**dear minhyun,**

> do you know what it feels like to wake up one day and realize you've been blocked on all sns platforms by someone you consider very important to you? you seem to be a pretty sociable person with a lot of experience in these matters, so maybe you do. but you see, for me, it was a first. does that sound stupid? i guess i don't foster connections deep enough with the people around me to warrant a block when things don't work out. does that mean our connection was deeper, then, since you actually did it? hah. i don't know whether the thought of it makes me want to laugh or cry.
> 
> "you can no longer send messages to this person."
> 
> there's an irrevocable finality to that statement, don't you think? it sounds so absolute, as if it's telling me that no matter how hard i try, there's just no way i'd ever be able to get through to that one person. very fitting for this situation, i'd say.
> 
> when i first saw that notification while trying to check how you were doing, i was too shocked to feel anything other than just that: shock. but pretty soon, other emotions started to wash over me, like buckets of cold water being dumped on me one after the other. i've been trying my best to keep myself in check, but if you were to ask me how i feel right now, i'd say it's pretty damn complicated. i'm sad over the fact that i can't talk to someone who means a lot to me. i'm even sadder because that same person apparently doesn't even want to see me around anymore. i'm confused as to why this happened so suddenly and what i did to cause this. i feel helpless. i feel empty. i feel lonely.
> 
> but if you ask me if i'm angry, i'll tell you i'm not sure. if this is all my fault, do i really have a right to be?
> 
> do you remember the last thing i said to you before you decided you don't want to hear from me anymore? i wasn't sure what the problem was, but back then, you felt a little distant. i didn't want to add to whatever was getting you down, so i wished for things to be better soon and said i'd just be around if you ever wanted to talk. it might be hard to believe, considering how bad i've always been at keeping to myself, but i was really set on respecting your choice and simply waiting. what i didn't expect was the thing that came after the wait: your choice to remove me from your life without so much as a warning.
> 
> okay, maybe i don't exactly feel angry, but i do feel upset about that. i'm sorry, but even if it really was my fault, i can't help it. we were doing fine not too long ago, weren't we? i had been sincere towards you the whole time, and i believe that you were being sincere to me too when you said you enjoyed my company. you only ever said nice things to me, and i really thought things were fine between us. i guess that's why this is so hard for me to process. did none of that matter, after all? i'm trying my best to wrap my head around this situation- to understand why you would suddenly cut me off with no explanation- but that seems a bit difficult when the end came so abruptly and so unexpectedly. you never gave me the chance to understand. did i not deserve even that much? i don't know. but to be honest with you, regardless of whether or not it could have been avoided, i still wish i knew why this had to happen. i wish you had yelled at me and told me how terrible i've been, how i've made you upset by saying this or by doing that. i'd much rather be aware of what i did wrong than be left in the dark with these neverending whys.
> 
> i'm being too self-centered, aren't it? i only keep talking about my feelings and what i wanted to happen. but what can i do, minhyun? i have no idea what you're thinking right now, much less what you were thinking when you decided you don't like me after all. i can guess, but i will never be sure unless you actually tell me. it's not that you owe me an explanation- i'm sure you have your reasons- but is it so wrong of me to feel this way? if i were completely fine with letting you go just like that, then wouldn't that be weirder?
> 
> i know every one of these letters are going to sound the same, with me repeatedly saying i wish i could understand this situation better. i know i'd never send any of these to you, and i know full well that you'd never read them even if i did. there's no point to what i'm doing, really. but would you mind if i keep writing these letters? consider them my way of trying to process what's happening, my way of making peace with the fact that i can't talk to you anymore and that i'd have to deal with my own shit myself. you'd probably mind if you knew, but since i'm never sending them to you anyway, it should be okay. right? it's ridiculous, but even now, i still don't want to upset you. i might get carried away and talk like i'm holding a grudge (i'm not), but you are still someone important to me. that one thing hasn't changed- and i doubt it ever will.
> 
> why do i get so exhausted whenever i try to write about how i feel, minhyun? am i being too emotional over a thing that was so short-lived? is there something wrong with me? you managed to end things without a fuss, so maybe i just have attachment issues or whatever. all i can say for sure is that i care about this a lot and i can't stop wondering where things started to go bad. maybe one of these days i'd be able to talk about this more lightheartedly. i'm not sure when that would be, but i'd get there.
> 
> it's getting late, so i'll end it here. i hope you've eaten well and are getting some good rest.
> 
> good night, minhyun. 

**— dongho**


	3. Chapter 3

** dear minhyun, **

> last night, i went to sleep thinking i'd start getting better after writing my thoughts down.
> 
> today, i woke up angry.
> 
> why is this happening to me? what unforgiveable thing did i do to deserve this? why was i made to care, only to be thrown away like i’m nothing?
> 
> do you know, minhyun? you were one of the very few people i've ever let in, yet this is what happened. can you blame me for feeling kind of betrayed?
> 
> i still believe you have your reasons. i refuse to think that you’re the kind of person who would use someone and cut them off when they’re not needed anymore. but still, i can’t help this bitterness blooming in my chest. no matter how hard i think about it, i just can’t understand why i have to be miserable like this.
> 
> ah. is that it? were you miserable because of me? is that why you blocked me out of your life in such a cold, harsh way? or should i start to accept that maybe, just maybe, none of this mattered to you in the first place?
> 
> it would have been nice if you had at least told me why. maybe if you had written me a letter like this, i would understand and i wouldn’t be in the state that i'm in right now. 
> 
> want to hear something funny? despite everything, i still catch myself thinking, “if only i could talk to minhyun about this. i’m sure he’d understand.” isn’t that tragic? as if you’re not the reason why i’m feeling all these things in the first place.
> 
> is it okay for me to be upset with you today, minhyun? don’t worry, i’m sure it won’t last; i’ll be back to being lonely and empty again in no time. but just for today, let me feel a bit betrayed, a bit bitter, a bit angry. maybe i need to get these ugly feelings out of my system to move past this.

** — dongho **


	4. Chapter 4

**dear minhyun,**

> i'm sorry for my outburst yesterday. i've been reflecting on it, and i realized that these feelings of bitterness and anger are indeed for myself and not for you.
> 
> i'm angry at myself for being so hung up on this and for letting my feelings get the best of me. like i said, it's pretty hard to move on when you can't understand the situation, and that's why i've been trying to come up with all kinds of possible explanations for what you did. this would sound really stupid, but in my desperation to make sense of things, i ended up turning to my old friend, google.
> 
> "why did a good friend suddenly shut me out?" i typed.
> 
> you know what i learned from that one simple search? my predicament isn't so unique after all. not that i ever thought it was, but it's interesting to see just how many people have experienced the same thing and have asked the same questions i've been asking.
> 
> some of the answers i found were pretty contradictory, though.
> 
> on one of the forums, there was someone who said:
>
>> _It's simple. You think that the person is close to you, but this person doesn't think the same. It's clear that your feelings don't matter to them, so take a long breath and let them go._
> 
> another person left this comment:
>
>> _The person who did this to you isn't someone who doesn't care or someone who just found you boring. He is a person who got emotionally charged to the extent that he developed an eager desire to remove you from his life. In other words, this isn't a sign that a person doesn't care, but in most cases it's a sign that the person thought about you a lot._
> 
> i wonder which one you are, minhyun. did you not care or did you care too much? if it's the latter, then what could have made you so emotional that you felt the need to block me out completely? is it this:
>
>> _Maybe your friend has done that because they’re going through something._
>> 
>> _Sometimes stuff happens with people and that stuff just spills onto us._
> 
> or this:
>
>> _It’s possible you may have grossly offended your friend – and it’s even possible you’ve been doing this for some time while your friend has been too ‘good and kind’ to react to it._
> 
> i’ve been exhausting myself trying to figure it out, but then someone else advised:
>
>> _The answer will present itself to you at the right time. But if you wait for it, pain is sure to be an everyday thing for you. Probably by the time you get to know, you may not even care. For now, try to move on. It's important._
> 
> they all have the same thing to say. move on. let go. only this one had a different tone and made me chuckle, despite myself:
>
>> _It’s the best feeling in this world. You can really laugh at your stupidity for being sad and depressed about it after 5 or 6 years._
> 
> do you think i'd be able to get to that point anytime soon? "5 or 6 years" sounds like a long time to be miserable over something like this. i hope that's not the case for me.
>
>> _People will keep doing similar things to you throughout life, whether you like it or not and whether you deserve it or not. I speak from experience. Initially, you feel horrible, like an artery of yours has been blocked, like you're being forced out of a habit and without good reason. It'll suck and you may just end up thinking about it for hours (like it happened with me). But with time, you have to realize that letting go of it is the best possible solution. You will definitely meet another person who is worthy of your time and companionship. Yes, you do need a closure, but life isn't always fair. Neither are friends._
> 
> reading what that last person wrote gave me a bit of relief. it felt like my pain was being understood. isn't that funny? you were the one who used to make me feel that way, minhyun. maybe that's the problem: if i didn't have so many good memories of you and the time we shared, then this whole thing wouldn't be as painful. but just like they all said, letting go is the only reasonable option here. i also know that it's what i'm supposed to do, but why is it so hard to actually just... do it?
> 
> i'm going to try and stop thinking about you, minhyun. i will resist the urge to visit any of your sns accounts. i will refuse to look at the same "hwang minhyun has blocked you" notification that mocks me every time i check if, by some miracle, you've had a change of heart. i'll try to put my mind and energy into other stuff, immerse myself in different activities to temper the feelings of sadness and rejection that have consumed me since the day you left me behind. i might even try meeting new people.
> 
> will i keep writing these letters? i don't know. putting my thoughts into words seems to help me process my feelings, so maybe i'd do it every time i find myself slipping back into the habit of asking these useless whys. it's not like i'm sending any of these to you, so it shouldn't really matter either way, right?
> 
> take care.

**— dongho**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> comments were taken from [this](https://www.quora.com/How-do-I-deal-with-someone-close-to-me-blocking-me-on-WhatsApp-and-Facebook), [this](https://www.quora.com/A-good-and-kind-friend-of-mine-suddenly-blocked-me-without-any-reason-and-theres-no-way-to-contact-her-What-can-I-do-Why-do-people-do-such-things), and [this](https://www.quora.com/How-does-it-feel-to-get-blocked-by-a-person-you-love)


	5. Chapter 5

**dear minhyun,**

> i clearly remember telling myself that i should stop thinking about you. apparently, i don't know how to listen to my own advice.
> 
> this morning, a thought came to me out of nowhere: what if this was all a misunderstanding? what if blocking me was something temporary and you never intended to push me out of your life in the first place? what if i had been overreacting this whole time? what if i was being miserable for no reason? yes! that's it! we never even fought before all of this happened, so my brand new theory definitely makes sense and is a very likely possibility. right?
> 
> with these thoughts in mind, i went through my day feeling a little more hopeful and a little less crappy. things will get better, i kept telling myself. it'll be okay once i get this whole situation cleared up. i can talk to you again, and we'll have a good laugh over how ridiculous i've been all because of one little misunderstanding.
> 
> however, when i tried to "clear up" the situation by reaching out to you, i was immediately dragged back to the cold and bitter reality by the "you can no longer send messages to this person" notification that greeted me upon opening our dms. at that point, i could only laugh at how pathetic i was being.
> 
> if you didn't mean for all this to be a sign that you wanted me out of your life, then you would've talked to me by now. you would've sent me a message saying, "hey, dongho, sorry about that. i was just trying something out. hope i didn't get you worried or anything." you wouldn't have blocked every possible way for me to try and get an explanation. if it were all a misunderstanding, you wouldn't have let it go on for this long.
> 
> you know the five stages of grief and moving on, right? denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. i'm pretty sure i already went through anger; i even wrote a letter to you about it the other day. i don't have any anger left within me, so i figured i've moved on to the stage of bargaining. why, then, do i find myself in denial at this moment? 
> 
> i read up on it prior to writing this letter, and apparently, everyone goes through the process of moving on in different ways. it doesn't have to be just those five stages, and it doesn't have to be in any particular order. people can even skip a stage or two sometimes. did you know that, minhyun? you're smart, so you probably do. i never actually had a reason to look these kinds of things up in the past, though, so it was something new to me. my first reaction was, wouldn't it be great if i had skipped the first four altogether and went directly to acceptance? that would've saved me a lot of time and feelings. but no, i have to go through all of these painful stages instead, jumping from one to the other and foolishy taking a couple of steps back every time i think i'm finally starting to move forward.
> 
> i wonder if you ever check my accounts to see how i'm doing. do you know i'm going back and forth these emotions right now, with no foreseeable end in sight? while i was reading through those forums before, i found an advice that said i should do the same thing that you did to me and just block you. but you know what? i really can't find it in me to do that. it kind of feels like petty revenge, and what's the point in that when i don't even feel resentful towards you? if, one day, you ever feel like coming to me to talk about what happened, then you'd be more than welcome to do so. you could even drop me a "hey, how's your day going so far, dongho?" like you always used to do, and i'd reply with "it's okay i guess lol how about yours?" without missing a beat.
> 
> wait, is this what bargaining is? or does entertaining these thoughts mean i'm in denial of the reality that you probably don't think about me anymore, much less think about doing any of those things? and did you notice how i keep saying "probably" when it should be a given by now? that's denial too, right? 
> 
> ah. i'm getting a headache mulling things over like this, so i'll end the letter here. i'm pretty sure i'd eventually write another one soon anyway; i'd just save the rest of what i have to say for when that happens. i should go to bed early tonight since i haven't been getting much sleep these days. for now, good night and have a good rest, minhyun.

**— dongho**


	6. Chapter 6

**dear minhyun,**

> today, for the first time in a while, i felt okay. i didn't feel sad, confused, nor angry. thoughts of you were still at the back of my mind, but they didn't consume me the way they always had since you left.
> 
> right when i thought i'd finally be able to get through a whole day without encountering a minhyun-related incident, i found myself doing something ridiculous: i opened our dms. again.
> 
> yes, i know it was stupid of me to do that. why would i sabotage myself when i was already doing so good? i don't know, honestly. maybe i like wallowing in misery after all. not that our conversations made me sad; what gives me pain is the fact that we can't have them anymore.
> 
> why were you so nice to me, minhyun? the end may be bitter, but the rest of the time we shared, from the first day to the last, was only filled with good memories. at least that's how it was for me, so can you blame me for looking back wistfully at those moments?
> 
> do you still remember the day we first became acquainted with each other? back then, i didn't actually expect us to become close. but before you get the wrong idea, let me clarify: it wasn't because i didn't have a good impression of you. in fact, it was the opposite. you came off as the kind of person who would be very well-liked. you were friendly, funny, and engaging. you were good with your words and knew how to make people feel comfortable around you. i guess that was why i initially didn't think you'd stay long enough for me to become this attached to you. what would you need my company for when you already had a bunch of friends you could spend your time with?
> 
> you used to laugh whenever i told you this. "i'm really none of those things, dongho," you used to say. you never believed me, minhyun, but to me, you were all that and more. you were someone who laughed at my mindless jokes and listened to my endless ramblings. you understood my weird tastes and even related to them. you picked up on my insecurities, lifted me up, and made me feel more understood and more accepted than i've ever felt in a really long time. at one point, when i was going through a rough patch, you were the one person who worried about me enough to check up on me.
> 
> you did all of those without making me feel like i had to do anything in return, but you see, minhyun, i did- no, i _do_ wish i can be someone like that to you as well. i want to be someone you can rely on, someone who's a positive presence in your life. but i can't be any of those to you now, can i? or is this your way of telling me that the one thing i can do for you this time is to let you go?
> 
> "i'm just glad you're talking to me." that's what you always told me whenever i joked about how amazed i was at how well you were tolerating my antics. i don't know if you meant it back then, but i feel like i should have been the one telling you that. you didn't have to do anything at all, you know. you didn't have to comfort me nor make me feel secure. i was just glad you were talking to me. no, actually, you didn't even have to talk to me as much as you did. i was just glad that you were around, that you thought i was a worthy companion.
> 
> maybe that's why this whole thing hurts more than it should. if you had only stopped spending time with me, i probably wouldn't be as hung up on this as i am right now. through the years, many people have come into my life only to drift out of it eventually, so i've gotten pretty good at handling the slow and gradual ends to the bonds i've made. oh, i'd be crushed, definitely; you're not just anyone to me, after all. i'm sure i'd always be hoping for you to show up again, but i think i would've taken that kind of ending better. 
> 
> the thought that i had been someone who gave you enough negativity to deserve being cut off so abruptly- that's what guts me. i can't stand the possibility that you didn't simply get bored but was hurt because of me, especially since you've been nothing but good to me this whole time. of course i never want you to be hurt in general, but the thought that i might have been the one to cause it makes me feel so awful. if that were really the case, then i wish i could make it up to you- or even just apologize properly.
> 
> i know this isn't only about what i want, though. whether or not you made that decision because of me, it's your life, and you're the one who gets to decide what you want to keep in it and what you're better off without. if you think you'd be happier like this, then there's nothing i can do but respect that. it's painful and it's hard to accept, but i know that much at least.
> 
> i can't lie and say i've come to terms with it, though. if moving on were that easy, then i wouldn't be writing these letters in the first place. but believe me, even though i keep messing the process up by making some really stupid decisions (for instance, going through our dms), i swear i'm trying my best. i just hope you're actually feeling better now that i'm not in your life anymore. it'd be tragic if all of this happened for nothing.
> 
> have a good night, minhyun. i miss you.

**— dongho**


	7. Chapter 7

**dear minhyun,**

> do you realize that you've unblocked me on one sns account? was that accidental or did you do that on purpose? had it happened much earlier, i probably would have swooped in at the chance to ask you for an explanation, but now...
> 
> i can't seem to find the courage to do it. believe me, i'm dying to talk to you again. it's just... i'm too wary of all the what-ifs. what if it was nothing but a mistake? a slip of a finger? what if you end up disliking me even more for being so pushy and so desperate? what if i get blocked as soon as i send you a message? i really don't think i can take rejection from you twice. i'm too scared of going through that kind of pain again.
> 
> you know what's funny? recently, i've been having dreams about the old friends i've lost contact with. in those hazy and disjointed scenarios, i'd always try to reconnect with them, but each time, i'd get the same answer: stop. don't bother us anymore. it's been years. move on. it's worded differently each time, but the message is always one and the same: my attempts at rekindling the bonds are unwelcome.
> 
> what if the same thing happens the moment i try to approach you again, minhyun? rejection in dreams is painful enough; i don't even want to imagine how much more it would hurt in reality.
> 
> but knowing how reckless i can be when i get too consumed by my emotions, it's probably only a matter of time before i end up doing something stupid again. you see, no matter how hard i try to distract myself by doing other things, no matter how many times i'm reminded that i should be looking forward instead of looking back, i just can't get rid of this weight i keep carrying around with me- the weight of your absence, that is. it doesn't make sense, does it? when you disappeared, you left a gaping hole in my chest, but how can such emptiness feel so heavy?
> 
> do you think i'm a coward for hesitating like this after all the fuss i made over not having any way to contact you? or is it the other way around? do you think i'm pathetic for considering reaching out to you again simply because i've been shown the smallest bit of an opening- and probably by accident too?
> 
> i wish you could send me a signal, minhyun. you'd never read this letter, but for once, i really wish these thoughts could reach you. i'm pretty dense. you know that, right? i often miss hints and cues when they're not spelled out for me; other times, i look too deep into things that aren't supposed to mean anything else. thinking back to it now, this slow-wittedness of mine might even be one of the reasons why you got tired of me. can you blame me for not trusting myself enough to interpret these kinds of things correctly? 
> 
> hah. it seems i've been doing so much thinking since you left. i don't know if i should find that funny or sad.
> 
> i miss you, minhyun. in the end, that's really just what this is all about.
> 
> i miss you.
> 
> i miss you.
> 
> i really miss you.
> 
> i hope you're taking care. 

**— dongho**


	8. Chapter 8

**dear minhyun,**

> in the end, i did reach out to you. in the end, i did get the answer i expected: nothing.
> 
> i waited and waited. i didn’t want to admit it, but i guess all this time i had been holding on to some vain hope that you’d eventually change your mind and tell me it was all a mistake. but with this...
> 
> it’s time to finally let go of everything, isn’t it?
> 
> “i hope he regrets it,” i found myself thinking earlier. 
> 
> but then i caught myself.
> 
> if i keep going like this and end up losing even the good memories, then what would i be left with? if i become bitter and resentful, then what would i get aside from another burden to carry?
> 
> before i become even more pathetic than i already am, i’m going to stop. i’m going to let you go, minhyun, and this time, i’m going to do it right. i won't hope for anything anymore. i won't try to contact you again. i’ll disappear from your life completely, the way you wanted it to happen when you first turned your back on me.
> 
> don’t get me wrong, though; i’m not going to do it for you. i’m going to do it for  myself. i’ll do it so i can finally heal and move past this. i’ll do it because i deserve closure— and if you wouldn’t give that to me, then i’d just have to give it to myself.  
>    
> 
> 
> and this? this is the last letter i’m ever writing you, so i’m going to try and end it properly.  
>    
> 
> 
> thank you for passing through my life.  
>    
> 
> 
> i had a good time.  
>    
> 
> 
> i wish you well.  
>    
> 
> 
> goodbye, hwang minhyun.

**— dongho**


End file.
